[ There are times where Akira reminds her strongly of Kou-- his sometimes deadpan sense of humor, the way he'd do anything for his friends.
And this too.
Rion, lightly pulled to a halt, turns to face him, still with that tired little smile. ]
I know. Logically, I know that it was the guy who used me. He told me I should feel honored, and even now, I can't entirely forgive him.
There's just... a part of me that still can't really shake the fact that it happened because I accepted that Grimm into me in the first place. Especially when I remember seeing all those bodies lying there, unconscious...
[ Rion swallows thickly, slowly shaking her head. ]
I'll believe it completely one day, probably. I'm just not entirely there yet.
[Akira sets his jaw tightly, and thinks back to Ann first. how Ann blamed herself for what happened to Shiho. . . for not calling Kamoshida on his bluff, for not standing up to him sooner. and it stokes dormant embers in his stomach, something that heats up rapidly and sets fire through his veins and reminds him of why he and the others became Phantom Thieves in the first place]
[shitty adults. shitty adults who wounded and scarred and treated great people like Rion and Ann and Shiho as tools for their own personal gain. and those three were the ones who had to live with the memories of those scars for the rest of their lives]
Nobody can blame you for the choices you made as a kid. [he continues, voice firm and emphatic. almost authoritative in its sound; she's never seen this from him before, that's for sure] No one can blame you for the choices you made while injured and desperate to keep living.
And if anyone ever tried. . . they'd be wrong.
[. . .]
I'll say that as many times as it takes for you to believe it.
[it may be bold, to say something when he's only hearing about the situation second hand from her. but he believes it]
[ It's true, she's never seen him like this. Dangerously mischievous, breathlessly fond, dryly sassy, but this new tone that allows for no arguments? That's new.
But he says it so firmly that even if she wanted to protest, Rion doubts the words would even come or put a dent in the wall of his conviction.
Her next breath is a shaky one. ]
You know, I was only telling you this so you knew I had this kind of thing inside of me.
[there's something about the way she phrases it that bothers him, too. he knows she wanted to be honest with him for the sake of being completely open, and he appreciates that so much more than he can say. but he can't shake the feeling that she also told him because she felt like he needed to know she could potentially be dangerous. like being around her had to come with warning signs. like she was some kind of liability]
[he doesn't want her to feel that way. if that is, in fact, how she feels. he can't make assumptions; he's only just now learning about her angel, after all. so instead he asks, his voice quieting into something softer]
. . . you said it was impossible for the Grimm to act up again, but-- are you afraid that it will?
[ He's not wrong. She'd wanted Akira to know because this, too, was still a secret and if they both really wanted to pursue something together, she wouldn't have been been happy if she'd kept this part entirely to herself.
But it was also a warning. Perhaps an unnecessary warning in the long run, but as long as the possibility wasn't 0%, she couldn't entirely dismiss it and act as though all she was... was an idol who just so happened to fight monsters.
Her gaze slips away from his, just barely. ]
I don't think I'll get possessed again-- I don't think it'll come to that. But that kind of destructive power...
... Yeah. I'm afraid that one day I might end up hurting the people around me again.
[ And Akira, having risen to become one of the closest people-- if nothing else, he ought to at least know that he could be endangered. ]
[ Rion lets him, tense as she is at first (she'd cried out when she'd remembered, and he'd smirked, smirked and wrapped his fingers around her chin as though he had every right in the world to touch her); Akira is incredibly, vastly different, and there's a gentleness in his touch that's almost at odds with his unyielding tone.
But that, too, is something gentle, in his own way. He says it so confidently, even though she'd tried to explain just how much damage she'd caused. He says it like he's entirely sure that he'd be fine, if it happened.
It's so absurd and so absolutely Akira that a laugh escapes-- though it's frail and choked.
Because this means so much. Maybe even more than he'll know. ]
[ it's more than a little gratifying to know that even Akira can't be smooth and suave all the time, and Rion smiles, lips lingering over his palm as she speaks. ]
Mm. I figured if anyone wouldn't change his mind over it, it'd be you.
[. . . haha. he turns away and tugs at his bangs with his free hand, slightly bashful]
What I went through is nothing compared to that.
[a false conviction, a ticket to Tokyo, an attempt on his life, a brutal interrogation— it all sounds so trivial, compared to Rion. he never thought of himself as particularly strong. he just. . . is willing to weather whatever it takes for his justice to take hold]
What we went through isn't something we should be comparing in the first place.
[ she'll just point that out. ]
You were blamed for a crime you never committed, people thought you were someone you weren't, and still you stepped in stop others from doing even worse things. You fought to make things right, Akira-- you and your friends.
[ Wow! She'll have to let go of his other hand to bat at him and save her face from this rude palm assault, though this is definitely not making her laugh any less. ]
[ And she rocks back on her heels, some of the amusement fading away in favor of a softer (but still very fond) tone. ]
If playing dirty means telling someone who happens to be very important to me that he's incredible and amazing and strong because he's weirdly not used to hearing it--
Then I'm down to get very dirty.
[ He'd supported her plenty just in this conversation. It had been about her long enough, and Aira really doesn't give himself proper credit, so Rion's more than fine taking up the reins in this department. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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And this too.
Rion, lightly pulled to a halt, turns to face him, still with that tired little smile. ]
I know. Logically, I know that it was the guy who used me. He told me I should feel honored, and even now, I can't entirely forgive him.
There's just... a part of me that still can't really shake the fact that it happened because I accepted that Grimm into me in the first place. Especially when I remember seeing all those bodies lying there, unconscious...
[ Rion swallows thickly, slowly shaking her head. ]
I'll believe it completely one day, probably. I'm just not entirely there yet.
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[shitty adults. shitty adults who wounded and scarred and treated great people like Rion and Ann and Shiho as tools for their own personal gain. and those three were the ones who had to live with the memories of those scars for the rest of their lives]
Nobody can blame you for the choices you made as a kid. [he continues, voice firm and emphatic. almost authoritative in its sound; she's never seen this from him before, that's for sure] No one can blame you for the choices you made while injured and desperate to keep living.
And if anyone ever tried. . . they'd be wrong.
[. . .]
I'll say that as many times as it takes for you to believe it.
[it may be bold, to say something when he's only hearing about the situation second hand from her. but he believes it]
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[ It's true, she's never seen him like this. Dangerously mischievous, breathlessly fond, dryly sassy, but this new tone that allows for no arguments? That's new.
But he says it so firmly that even if she wanted to protest, Rion doubts the words would even come or put a dent in the wall of his conviction.
Her next breath is a shaky one. ]
You know, I was only telling you this so you knew I had this kind of thing inside of me.
... But thanks, Akira.
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[there's something about the way she phrases it that bothers him, too. he knows she wanted to be honest with him for the sake of being completely open, and he appreciates that so much more than he can say. but he can't shake the feeling that she also told him because she felt like he needed to know she could potentially be dangerous. like being around her had to come with warning signs. like she was some kind of liability]
[he doesn't want her to feel that way. if that is, in fact, how she feels. he can't make assumptions; he's only just now learning about her angel, after all. so instead he asks, his voice quieting into something softer]
. . . you said it was impossible for the Grimm to act up again, but-- are you afraid that it will?
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But it was also a warning. Perhaps an unnecessary warning in the long run, but as long as the possibility wasn't 0%, she couldn't entirely dismiss it and act as though all she was... was an idol who just so happened to fight monsters.
Her gaze slips away from his, just barely. ]
I don't think I'll get possessed again-- I don't think it'll come to that. But that kind of destructive power...
... Yeah. I'm afraid that one day I might end up hurting the people around me again.
[ And Akira, having risen to become one of the closest people-- if nothing else, he ought to at least know that he could be endangered. ]
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You won't.
[he says, the firmness in his words from earlier seeping back into his voice]
You won't, because the people who care about you won't let that happen. Kou, Ann, Dave, me. . .
We're here for you, Rion.
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But that, too, is something gentle, in his own way. He says it so confidently, even though she'd tried to explain just how much damage she'd caused. He says it like he's entirely sure that he'd be fine, if it happened.
It's so absurd and so absolutely Akira that a laugh escapes-- though it's frail and choked.
Because this means so much. Maybe even more than he'll know. ]
G-geez, you and your cool speeches...
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It wasn't really a "speech."
I was just telling you how I felt.
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[ And she reaches up to grasp the hand cradling her cheek, warm and stable, and draws it back just enough, turns her head just enough--
To kiss his palm. Her way of thanking him when "thank you" isn't enough. ]
I guess this means you're okay with all of me, then?
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Like that was ever in doubt.
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Mm. I figured if anyone wouldn't change his mind over it, it'd be you.
I still thought I should tell you, though.
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[but at the same time, something about his expression falls]
I'm sorry you had to go through all of that, though.
[SHITTY ADULTS]
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[ Hand still grasping his, she lowers it to speak properly. ]
I think the thing that made me the angriest was how he looked down on idols. But that was about the time I realized how pathetic he was, and well...
An idol's will isn't anything that weak. I'm pretty sure I taught that to him thoroughly.
And I like to think I came out stronger for it, you know? I'm glad I was able to talk to you about it, too.
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You're definitely stronger for it.
[he can say that with conviction, despite not knowing her before her experiences with her angel]
You're one of the strongest people I've met here, Rion.
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[ She has to laugh, slowly twining their fingers together. ]
I've thought the same about you for awhile now, Akira.
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What I went through is nothing compared to that.
[a false conviction, a ticket to Tokyo, an attempt on his life, a brutal interrogation— it all sounds so trivial, compared to Rion. he never thought of himself as particularly strong. he just. . . is willing to weather whatever it takes for his justice to take hold]
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[ she'll just point that out. ]
You were blamed for a crime you never committed, people thought you were someone you weren't, and still you stepped in stop others from doing even worse things. You fought to make things right, Akira-- you and your friends.
That makes you really strong to me.
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Rion. . .
[-- WAIT]
Hang on, I was-- I was trying to say nice things about you. . .!
[he didn't ask for her to reciprocate!!]
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But you didn't say I couldn't do it too, right?
[ She gets enough praise and fawning back home, with very little chance to reciprocate. How could she pass up this opportunity? ]
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[SHOVES A HAND IN HER FACE]
[his cheeks are red. and this is absolutely not an every day look for Akira, either]
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H-have I mentioned you're adorable lately?
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Several times, but they're drowned out by the number of times you said I wasn't cute.
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[ Hold on, she has to wipe her eyes. Thanks, Akira, she needed that laugh. ]
Let's just say how cute you're being right now will probably cancel out the next ten times you won't be cute at all.
[ How can one person be dangerously forward and awkwardly endearing, why is Akira so wonderful ]
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You play so dirty. . .
[as though Akira is also not totally capable of disarming kindness]
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[ And she rocks back on her heels, some of the amusement fading away in favor of a softer (but still very fond) tone. ]
If playing dirty means telling someone who happens to be very important to me that he's incredible and amazing and strong because he's weirdly not used to hearing it--
Then I'm down to get very dirty.
[ He'd supported her plenty just in this conversation. It had been about her long enough, and Aira really doesn't give himself proper credit, so Rion's more than fine taking up the reins in this department. ]
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